A lonely Christmas? Time to change perspective


You’ve probably come across the article on “Top ten Christmas health risks” on BBC Health News by Fergus Walsh on

I am appreciative of his intention to keep us warned. Although enough warnings have been sent out this December with the entire Maya Calendar fuss. Paying attention to what we eat, how we behave, how much we drink, how safe are our kids are all to the point. I have to admit, these are valid not only for the festive season.
What made my brain raise a ‘ni-ni-ni” voice was the last paragraph: “10. Lonely this ChristmasThere’s only one thing worse than being surrounded by your relatives at Christmas and that’s not being surrounded by them. Someone callsSamaritans every six seconds but the charity says the idea that Christmas is the busiest time of year is something of a myth”.”138976886 Well, this is a rather pessimistic outlook, isn’t it? While I appreciate the reality, it is us who create our reality. We are all special. And special attracts special. And why not spend alone a Christmas? Is solitude in a time like Christmas that bad? See how time alone at Christmas turned out for TAMSIN OXFORD. She used it, in her own words to “reconnect with herself and enjoy the solitude”: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1340002/My-lonely-Christmas-Dumped-depressed-writer-fled-Vienna-spend-holiday–changed-life-good.html.I value time alone as it gives the beautiful chance to listen to the voices inside, which have been otherwise silent or censured by others’ voices and expectations. It is an opportunity to do an internal soft audit, go through different perspectives and simply appreciate the time with thoughts and moods which are meaningful to you. One may be surrounded by people at Christmas, and yet cry in their solitude.There are other options. For instance,  go to Orhan Pamuk for advice: “Even at the end of my life, there is still plenty that made me smile:1. Children-They represent what is vital in the world.

2. Sweet memories of handsome boys, beautiful women, painting well and friendship.

3. Seeing the masterpieces of old masters.” (“My Name is Red”)

You certainly have your own list of beauties. And these are just eye discoveries of what our mind already knows.  Those who value you will be there, before and after Christmas.

I remember my grandmother, a mother of 6, often alone on Christmas after her kids left home and just happy to see some of us the second or third day after Christmas.

Or maybe there is just a need for loneliness, for a change. “The time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself”, Douglas Coupland.

Whatever it is, focus on Christmas, not on ‘lonely’.

Count your blessings and come back refreshed! Enjoy your Christmas wherever you are!

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