Is friendship a commodity?


The usual verbs associated with a commodity are ‚loose’, ‚gain’, ‚destroy’, ‚add’ all fit with friendship as well. Still some verbs like ‚nurture’ do not always find easily their way of being associated with such a ‚commodity’.

Can one loose a friend? My take is no, one cannot. We do not own friends, thus cannot loose them. What we loose or miss is the feelings a friendship brings.

I remember my first encounter  with a dear friend of mine. It was 15 years ago. We were both attending a summer course: me as a student, he as a rep of the organizers  He wore a bright colorful tea-shirt and orange bermuda   Over time, he played milestones’ roles in my life: when I took admission exams to postgraduate studies, when I was considered for a fellowship, before job interviews, after job interviews, reviewing my work, keeping my feet on the ground … He is great fun to be with: I still remember the smell of coffee and the taste of croissant we were having in a French cafe in a French city and our endless talks about everything and nothing. He moved to  another country, then to another continent. Still, the warm, tender, sweet friendship feelings stay with me for years.

Once a mentor of mine told me that ‚you have to be lucky to meet good people’. Over time I have grown to understand that I also need to be wise enough to keep them in my life.

Keeping is not necessarily physical. It is more mental and perhaps spiritual.

They say marriage is made in heaven. So is friendship! Right, St. Peter? 🙂

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